Perfectly Imperfect: When You're Dissatisfied With Mediocre (hope for the perfectionist part 2)

Continued from this previous post…

I wonder how I’ll breathe.

I don’t suppose a baby worries about how he will breathe when he leaves his mother’s womb and meets oxygen for the first time.

And if I counter my perfectionism with surrender, what might that look like? I’m pretty sure I won’t asphyxiate.

I think that beneath all of those high standards is fear.

I am afraid.

Who do you depend on?

I hide behind my own self-sufficiency.

Because God is one of many things I depend on, instead of being the One in whom I depend.

As I figure out how to do this in my own life, I’ve been encouraged by some recent sermons preached about Romans 3 by my pastor, Tony Taylor. In them, he asked some very heavy questions.

What do you do to justify your existence?

Do you want to serve God or do you want God to serve you?

Where do you run for comfort? Long for passionately? Feed or fear?

According to Pastor Tony, our disappointments reveal our true idols. Hmmm…

And it’s here, in the midst of conviction, where things can get ugly for me. Because perfectionists are condemning. What happens when we aren’t getting it right? Where do we go with that?

Giving myself permission to be human does not mean I stop growing or trying. It doesn’t mean sin or disappointments or mistakes don’t matter. But there’s something very freeing when I accept that I’m in a life-long process and I don't have to have it all figured out right now.

“All you need is need! Too humbled to be self-centered and too affirmed by God to need to be.” Tony Taylor

There is more to this complex story — of how perfectionism is tied to impossible expectations and how these expectations coupled with an unhealthy dependence on others or self can leave you feeling consistently disappointed and dissatisfied. Chapters about control issues and distrust, hope and redemption.

But for now, thanks for visiting me in this valley and walking with me as I figure out how to accept myself and others —as perfectly imperfect.

What does utter dependence on God look like in your life?

How have you found freedom from perfectionism or high expectations of yourself or others?

Might setting healthy boundaries temper unmet expectations, disappointments, and dissatisfaction?
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Linking today with the Soli Deo Gloria Party at Finding Heaven.


Recent related posts from A Heartening Life:
The Measure of Success — read it here
When a Snake Blocks Your Path (letting go of control) — read it here